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Everything Is Terrible

by Synthetic Sun

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1.
I bought bad behavior for a price, I’m never going to take your advice. I brought you a dead boy and you said that we can try to resurrect it from the dead. See I won the fight but I lost the war. I really hope that I’m not coming off a bore. I said I felt I was sold for parts, and now I’m laking both a conscience and a heart. It’s just not what I wanted, I just wanted to feel. So don’t go back on your word, I thought we had a deal. Now all the colors are fighting or attention, and the boys are fighting for a line. It’s just not what I wanted. It’s just not what I wanted. Whisper in my head. Tell me all the things that you never said. Picture in your bed is the one you love but the one you love is dead. And if I was wrong then I apologize but you cut me down to your perfect size and when you were done you just threw me away a pretty predator and I was just your prey.
2.
Playing Dead 04:12
I cannot believe you today. You have a way with getting your way. You pack a punch in that sneaky little touch. But, hold your tongue babe, it's gonna start a fire. And hold my hand cause you are such a good liar. And it all starts with a shock to the heart. So there I go again always playing pretend when I'd rather be playing dead. These are the words that drip from my bleeding lips. But I'm a liar so don't read into this. Let's meet in an honest place and you'll wear that blank look on your face, scared just like a child. But you can hide it with a smile. I'll admit I'm a mess. I don't do well under stress. I am trying but I am not at my best. Take a pretty little picture, almost makes your lips hurt from all of the wanting, only wanting one thing.
3.
Time 03:39
Oh no we’re not going home we’d rather go it alone. Our parents taught us how to run away when things get scary. I hope I can earn your trust but don’t try to be one of us. Don’t go and screw it up unless you want to end up buried. People like me are just fine but it would be such crime if you replaced that smile with eyes and tones more condescending. You sent a letter to God hoping that he would respond. His assistant wrote you back and all said was “prayer pending” Seeing clear is self sabotage and being here is backwards. I am always uncomfortable and I never say the right words. Concentrating on the cure. Sleep away your prime. Frightening the ones you love is good from time to time. If killing time is the cure, you're always left wanting more. Don't take on something you can't handle you're not acrobatic. Closing your eyes in the car just won’t get you very far. Cause you don’t want to die you’re just acting overdramatic. So you can let the blood drip slowly from your finger tips. As you write down your lies cut the ties with friends and family. Cause scars don't heal over time. They're just a promise you'll die. I don't know how else to say it and I won't put it gently. I just wanna get hurt, I just want to feel pain. But my hand through a wall or a bullet through my brain. Whatever you say will only rough me up because just being friends is never enough.
4.
What a crooked smile. Oh what a well fit mask. You are a broken mirror and now I’m stepping on the glass. Just about as beautiful as a valentine. You raise as many questions as you do vital signs. And if I ever wanted to address the sin, I’d speak to you directly, cause you get under my skin. So baby pull me apart piece by distractive piece. Cause just to have you touch me would be a relief But If I let you down would you still love me? If love is what you need I guess that I can try. I just might need to borrow some of your supply. Just keep on taking your antidepressant pills and let the chemicals rush in like an oil spill. A bitter end is just what is bound to come. And just like that you saw what I was running from. When did we stop feeling and start taking drugs? I said "I thought that we were better?” and then you just shrugged.
5.
Safety Pin 04:18
I don't have a death wish I'm just awfully selfish. I don't have any peace but I do have some pills. You swim so deep in the water that you can’t find the fish. I don't have self control, all I have is free will. And I feel like I owe you something especially since you were so kind in taking off your dress. It’s mysterious how in shallow form that a moral standard just won’t keep us warm. Cause you came to win, and thats what you did. So baby don’t pretend that it’s not your sin. I’m wearing thin, and you’ve always been so beautiful. You’re my safety pin. Bloodshot eyes are instrumental to your madness. Ever growing, cigarette smoking to the tune of your sadness. And all those lies are crucial to the cure. Your lies sound so sweet so baby lie to me some more.
6.
Don't misquote you're memories. Be happy in your own way, but away from me. Don't mistake an apology as an excuse to drain the life out of me. Don't think that I will care. Cause you're much too shallow with your fake blond hair. Maybe I'm just being mean. You know it's just like me to make a scene. Baby blue blankets and little white lies. Take another look at your so called bride. If you told me about the books you read, you’d probably rather tell a boy who reads instead. I am all of the habits she hates. I am condescending but I'm not fake. Make me your personal toy. Something you can enjoy. And keep me under your bed underneath all of the things that you said.
7.
What if it’s not actually real? What we never felt but thought we were supposed to feel. What if I started to think about the way you never lent a hand when I started to sink. I’m over this feeling of hating myself. It comes more than once and a while, it’s getting bad for my health. Brace yourself because the ones you hate will tell you everything that you can't be today. I thought that I was over this. I guess I’m just searching for one more quick fix. Just one more flavor in the mix. I guess a shot to the head might just do the trick. I wanna shut it off and feel alright, if I could just control it just for one night. Brace yourself cause theres no easy way out of this. You only get one shot so try your hardest not to miss.
8.
I'm sorry I'm not what you want. Or not what you expected. You see the back before you see the front. And now you are feeling cheated. I can't be what you need. I can't show you a good time. You're scratching it until it bleeds but it feels so nice. I feel violent and aware. Honey I don't mean to stare. Now I'm falling out my chair cause I feel violent and aware. You can take your precious time. Suck it up and read the lines. Now I'm pulling out my hair cause I feel violent and aware. Your messing this whole thing up. And you don't even regret it. Your love is like a hit and run. Too quick to tell where it's headed. You brought me to the place, and now you say your leaving? I just want to get another taste before you're gone for the season. I guess I have myself to blame. I'm too young to be careful. Now you look like a crying shame crying into the sink bowl. I have a tendency to make a scene, and this won't be the last time. You're gonna need a trampoline for expectations that high.
9.
Break 05:12
I’ve grown so tired of the sound that you make. Superstition’s got me staying up late. If you want to you can carry my weight, cause I’m getting tired and I’m starting to break. I’m as plain as pavement under your feet. Take a good look cause theres nothing to see. I can tell that you’ll walk all over me, or run your mouth too much more specifically. Sit on the floor, taking notes, making war with yourself. You can’t help that her voice is your underscore. We’re selfish kids never wanting to forgive. Crawl back to it, call it love, make it genuine. Everything always just seems so mundane. Making promises just ends up in pain. Pump your lies in me just like novocain. But I need your love just like the blood in my veins. It’s all a blur, you can’t be sure you’ll get out alive. Thats when she said “I'd prefer to just say goodbye”
10.
Alice 04:01
Kiss me with your bloody knife, honey, puncture my skin. Let the air drain from my body and in result make my head spin. Grace me with your presence or bury me in your backyard. Let me live amongst the flowers and I’ll be their bodyguard. Let me drink from your water. I’ll drink every drop you bleed. I’ll keep you warm through the winter. Let me be your cup of tea. Even if you can’t stick around, I swear that I will never leave. You never run away from your feelings, cause you don’t scare that easily. Make a pillow out of shoulders. Brush my bare skin with your cheek. I’ve loved you for so long the grass has turned from dead to green. Give life to an innocent feeling. Make the birds in my head sing all these songs about the beauty in learning, and missing their home back in the tree.
11.
I don’t see the point in smoking when it makes my head ache. And I don’t understand you when you’re talking to me that way. I’m always feeling too much and baby now you’re out of touch. So please excuse me cause I need to pack up things and I’m about as motivated as an old mattress spring. I’m half asleep and I’m set on defeat and when they kicked you out of heaven did you land on both your feet? And I have heard it all before cause I’m your prisoner of war. And I can’t help but cry when you are saying your goodbyes. Cause I know I’ve been here before and when it rains it tends to pour and I can’t be here anymore. For a second I thought that I could lie and tell you that you were wrong. You know it's just like me to make a scene when it's all in my head all along. And don't you forget that, that voice is still creeping. It's in my bed while I am sleeping. God knows I want to love you but when you look at me like that it knocks me down a few cause I know you're never coming back.

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The debut album from Synthetic Sun.

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released January 29, 2016

All songs written and performed by Nick Geller and Mikey Peterson. Recorded, mixed and mastered by Gabe Usery @ Encapsulated Studios

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Synthetic Sun St. Louis, Missouri

Synthetic Sun is a punk rock band from St. Louis, Missouri. The trio brings together a fusion of aggression and melody that ignites audiences and challenges the status quo. Drawing inspiration from the raw emotions of daily life, Synthetic Sun's lyrics tackle themes of defiance, awkward situations, and the struggle for self-expression. ... more

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